hey kids,
I would like to welcome our newest follower, Karen. OK, so everyone all at once say hi to Karen, ready, HIIII Karen.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Random thoughts
Do nice guys really finish last?
That was a question that was kind of asked to me tonight. To be honest, I'm not sure that my answer was accurate, so now I'm up going over it in my head. And I have to say, although I said the opposite of what I am feeling now, I have to say it does seem that we as a whole tend to be nicer to people that aren't kind. Why? I know I asked this in another post some time ago but honestly, why is that?
I didn't think nice guys finished last and that is what my answer was, I think I believe that. Although it does seem the other side of the argument has a pretty good case as well. If anyone is in fact reading this, now would be a good time to chime in. Do nice guys finish last?
On another note, the conspiracy to ensure that I never have more than one square is still going strong. Honestly, I know this is TMI but even when out in public, I check it looks good and to my dismay there really does seem to be a conspiracy.
Maybe it's a trade off for the laundry, which by the way, I seem to be winning. I wasn't really looking for a trade off, I wanted a full out win on something for God's sake but as of now a trade off it is.
On a final more personal note (sounds odd coming from a person that just told anyone reading this about the toilet paper issue) happy anniversary to my wonderful husband. You changed my life for the better the day I met you and continue to do so every day. I am truly blessed to have such a supportive, loving and hard working partner and friend. You have loved me and stood by me through so much. We've definitely been tested more then once but I wouldn't have wanted to go through the stuff with anyone but you. Thanks for the everything, the craziness, the laughs, the getting me and as I already said the support and understanding but mostly the unconditional love that for whatever reason you keep bringing to me. I love you dearly and forever, you 7-11 coffee loving, bad taste in music, squirrel chasing freak. Who also happens to be the one person I'm sure is reading this because you support me in everything I do and God love you, always thinks what I do great. And that is why you are and will always remain my love of a lifetime xoxo
For anyone else reading, sorry I know you want to go vomit right now. My pictures of up in the store, now I hope someone, anyone will buy at least one. Wish me luck, sideliners this is for all of us.
That was a question that was kind of asked to me tonight. To be honest, I'm not sure that my answer was accurate, so now I'm up going over it in my head. And I have to say, although I said the opposite of what I am feeling now, I have to say it does seem that we as a whole tend to be nicer to people that aren't kind. Why? I know I asked this in another post some time ago but honestly, why is that?
I didn't think nice guys finished last and that is what my answer was, I think I believe that. Although it does seem the other side of the argument has a pretty good case as well. If anyone is in fact reading this, now would be a good time to chime in. Do nice guys finish last?
On another note, the conspiracy to ensure that I never have more than one square is still going strong. Honestly, I know this is TMI but even when out in public, I check it looks good and to my dismay there really does seem to be a conspiracy.
Maybe it's a trade off for the laundry, which by the way, I seem to be winning. I wasn't really looking for a trade off, I wanted a full out win on something for God's sake but as of now a trade off it is.
On a final more personal note (sounds odd coming from a person that just told anyone reading this about the toilet paper issue) happy anniversary to my wonderful husband. You changed my life for the better the day I met you and continue to do so every day. I am truly blessed to have such a supportive, loving and hard working partner and friend. You have loved me and stood by me through so much. We've definitely been tested more then once but I wouldn't have wanted to go through the stuff with anyone but you. Thanks for the everything, the craziness, the laughs, the getting me and as I already said the support and understanding but mostly the unconditional love that for whatever reason you keep bringing to me. I love you dearly and forever, you 7-11 coffee loving, bad taste in music, squirrel chasing freak. Who also happens to be the one person I'm sure is reading this because you support me in everything I do and God love you, always thinks what I do great. And that is why you are and will always remain my love of a lifetime xoxo
For anyone else reading, sorry I know you want to go vomit right now. My pictures of up in the store, now I hope someone, anyone will buy at least one. Wish me luck, sideliners this is for all of us.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Sideliners....I have news!!!
So, I have news for all us sideliners. My pictures were accepted into a boutique!!! What's more is the owner of the store is going to show them to a gallery. I am in no way saying anyone will buy my pictures or that the gallery will allow them to be hung up but I am so excited. This is so exciting for me, no matter what comes of this, it is a victory for the sideliner in me. I can't believe I had the nerve to actually show my pictures to my friends, let alone a person that would actually critique them honestly. Then to have her actually like them and show them is beyond my wildest dreams.
Which brings me to my point, yes, I do have one other than just boring you with my cheesey yay moment. I set out on Super Bowl Sunday to make a dream come true, that dream of a column didn't come true but I decided that day to do something for me, not my family, not my friends, me. That was a huge step for me and then starting this blog and putting out there for anyone to read made me accountable to keep going. I'd have to keep going if I was going to say to all the other sideliners to follow dreams how could I sit idle? My friends and family know how much I dreamed about having a gallery showing of my "work" but they also know that to me the gallery was going to be my living room. I am doubtful that my pictures will actually be accepted by the gallery although I am praying that they do. That is my secret dream, a real gallery, I can't even wrap my brain around it. I had the whole night planned in my head, what I would wear, who would be there and never for one moment thinking it would really happen. Odds are it won't but I have to tell you how great it feels to know that someone that owes me nothing feels they can and so much so that she is bringing them herself.
Sideliners, no matter what happens, and I will tell you the truth on the outcome, the victory is in the fact that I went outside my safe zone and showed them. No matter what I win. So I have to take it to you now, I put myself out there and no it's your turn. I mean come on, I even blogged about my most personal thoughts on the deaths of my friend and my brother in order to try and move forward in my life. I don't talk about that stuff, that is something I for the most part keep between me and them. I talk to them every day and tell them how I feel but putting it on here is so not who I am.
However, I knew in order to move forward I have to put it all out there and I am trying. Please stay on board with me and do what you secretly desire, I'm here to listen and help and I know others will be pulling for you too. The outcome isn't important, what is important is that you made yourself a priority and that you tried. That is the victory and a victory nobody can ever take away from you. The column doesn't appear to be coming but I've learned after this experience to never say never. Only God knows our outcome but I did also learn that we do have a say in it as well. I will keep you posted on how this goes, if it goes and you please do the same.
To be continued.....
Which brings me to my point, yes, I do have one other than just boring you with my cheesey yay moment. I set out on Super Bowl Sunday to make a dream come true, that dream of a column didn't come true but I decided that day to do something for me, not my family, not my friends, me. That was a huge step for me and then starting this blog and putting out there for anyone to read made me accountable to keep going. I'd have to keep going if I was going to say to all the other sideliners to follow dreams how could I sit idle? My friends and family know how much I dreamed about having a gallery showing of my "work" but they also know that to me the gallery was going to be my living room. I am doubtful that my pictures will actually be accepted by the gallery although I am praying that they do. That is my secret dream, a real gallery, I can't even wrap my brain around it. I had the whole night planned in my head, what I would wear, who would be there and never for one moment thinking it would really happen. Odds are it won't but I have to tell you how great it feels to know that someone that owes me nothing feels they can and so much so that she is bringing them herself.
Sideliners, no matter what happens, and I will tell you the truth on the outcome, the victory is in the fact that I went outside my safe zone and showed them. No matter what I win. So I have to take it to you now, I put myself out there and no it's your turn. I mean come on, I even blogged about my most personal thoughts on the deaths of my friend and my brother in order to try and move forward in my life. I don't talk about that stuff, that is something I for the most part keep between me and them. I talk to them every day and tell them how I feel but putting it on here is so not who I am.
However, I knew in order to move forward I have to put it all out there and I am trying. Please stay on board with me and do what you secretly desire, I'm here to listen and help and I know others will be pulling for you too. The outcome isn't important, what is important is that you made yourself a priority and that you tried. That is the victory and a victory nobody can ever take away from you. The column doesn't appear to be coming but I've learned after this experience to never say never. Only God knows our outcome but I did also learn that we do have a say in it as well. I will keep you posted on how this goes, if it goes and you please do the same.
To be continued.....
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Toilet paper conspiracy
Yes, yes, you read that right. I truly believe there is a conspiracy to drive me nuts in my house and now they are using the toilet paper as their weapon.
I need to know how I am always the person that when I use the bathroom, the toilet paper roll is empty!!! Empty, cardboard hanging there smiling at me as if to say, "heh, go ahead make my day". This has become the norm these days, however, get a load of this scene and understand why I now know it is NOT co-incidence. The other day, let's just say as we did when we were kids, I had to go and it was an emergency. I sit, I go and when I was done looked over and yes there was my cardboard hanging there looking at me like the eyeballs in the Geico commercial. Soooo, I yell to my daughter to help me out, which she did. I then start to leave the house to realize I need to use the bathroom, again. I run the upstairs, quickly take care of business and yes you guessed it, the cardboard in this bathroom is also now looking at me, and I am telling you it laughed at me. That's right, it laughed. I figure don't let this piss you off, beat them by continuing your day and enjoy it. So I yell to my daughter to rescue me, AGAIN and after numerous shouts and no answer, I take measures into my own hands. Not sure if this is the proper place to say how I handled my situation but no I did not use the cardboard. I will share this, I was wearing a skirt and I may or may not have made a dash with my dress around my waist in search for a solution.
I handle my problem, search for my daughter that has been waiting for me in the car. When I finally make it outside (all nice and dry), OK, I know that was gross. Anyway, she looks at me like what happened? She could tell me the fire in my eyes not to ask questions and to be in a really good mood.
This is not where it ends, of course not. We go away for a sports tournament and after traveling a few hours in the car, we all need to use the bathroom. Sure, fine, so I wait my turn and yup you guessed it again, EMPTY!! OK, you have got to be joking at this point. Is this the same cardboard and it actually is not my family just being too lazy and selfish to change the roll. Is this like the Geico money and is actually following me and throwing out the full rolls just to annoy me. I know of course not, my family members are pigs. During my stay I change the roll twice, we change rooms on the last day because they had an opening for a larger room and I kid you not, when I went in the bathroom, the freaking roll had one square left on it.
I know this post is not for those with weak stomach's and yes, absolutely too much information, although I will have you know I could have been much worse. I will win this battle, not sure exactly just yet how I plan on my win, but I will win. I'm thinking of keeping a roll on me at all times and hiding all the toilet paper so that every time everyone needs to use the bathroom, they will know that the toilet paper, like money doesn't just appear. It is actually put there by people, not magic. I will give step by step directions for those of you that read this and also may have been under the impression that it just appears.
Step one:
go to where you keep your toiletries. This can either be the pantry, if you have one, or possibly a linen closet and some even keep it right under the sink.
Step two:
If the package is unopened, make a tear in the package and take out one roll of t.p.
Then, look for the part of the roll where it is "fused" together and gently tear that part up.
Step three:
Go to the toilet paper hanger and take off the old roll. Depending on what type of hanger you have, this step will vary. I have 2 kinds, the first kind is simple all you have to do is lift the empty roll up no tricks, just lift up. Take the cardboard that is left there and throw it out. Take the new roll and simply slip it through the rod in your hand and place it back on the the holder. The other type can be a bit ore tricky but believe me it can be done. What you need to do is place your hand on the bar holding the toilet paper and push it gently to the side and it will release itself from its holder.
Step four:
Just like the other holder, take cardboard off the rod and replace with new paper.
Step five:
Put the full roll on the rod and taking on side of the rod at a time simply place into the hole on the inside of the holder, follow this step on the other side and whola you are done.
Now some people like the paper beginning at the top while others on coming from the back. Personally, I just want the paper REPLACED!!!
Thank you, enjoy your day and remember to replace often
I need to know how I am always the person that when I use the bathroom, the toilet paper roll is empty!!! Empty, cardboard hanging there smiling at me as if to say, "heh, go ahead make my day". This has become the norm these days, however, get a load of this scene and understand why I now know it is NOT co-incidence. The other day, let's just say as we did when we were kids, I had to go and it was an emergency. I sit, I go and when I was done looked over and yes there was my cardboard hanging there looking at me like the eyeballs in the Geico commercial. Soooo, I yell to my daughter to help me out, which she did. I then start to leave the house to realize I need to use the bathroom, again. I run the upstairs, quickly take care of business and yes you guessed it, the cardboard in this bathroom is also now looking at me, and I am telling you it laughed at me. That's right, it laughed. I figure don't let this piss you off, beat them by continuing your day and enjoy it. So I yell to my daughter to rescue me, AGAIN and after numerous shouts and no answer, I take measures into my own hands. Not sure if this is the proper place to say how I handled my situation but no I did not use the cardboard. I will share this, I was wearing a skirt and I may or may not have made a dash with my dress around my waist in search for a solution.
I handle my problem, search for my daughter that has been waiting for me in the car. When I finally make it outside (all nice and dry), OK, I know that was gross. Anyway, she looks at me like what happened? She could tell me the fire in my eyes not to ask questions and to be in a really good mood.
This is not where it ends, of course not. We go away for a sports tournament and after traveling a few hours in the car, we all need to use the bathroom. Sure, fine, so I wait my turn and yup you guessed it again, EMPTY!! OK, you have got to be joking at this point. Is this the same cardboard and it actually is not my family just being too lazy and selfish to change the roll. Is this like the Geico money and is actually following me and throwing out the full rolls just to annoy me. I know of course not, my family members are pigs. During my stay I change the roll twice, we change rooms on the last day because they had an opening for a larger room and I kid you not, when I went in the bathroom, the freaking roll had one square left on it.
I know this post is not for those with weak stomach's and yes, absolutely too much information, although I will have you know I could have been much worse. I will win this battle, not sure exactly just yet how I plan on my win, but I will win. I'm thinking of keeping a roll on me at all times and hiding all the toilet paper so that every time everyone needs to use the bathroom, they will know that the toilet paper, like money doesn't just appear. It is actually put there by people, not magic. I will give step by step directions for those of you that read this and also may have been under the impression that it just appears.
Step one:
go to where you keep your toiletries. This can either be the pantry, if you have one, or possibly a linen closet and some even keep it right under the sink.
Step two:
If the package is unopened, make a tear in the package and take out one roll of t.p.
Then, look for the part of the roll where it is "fused" together and gently tear that part up.
Step three:
Go to the toilet paper hanger and take off the old roll. Depending on what type of hanger you have, this step will vary. I have 2 kinds, the first kind is simple all you have to do is lift the empty roll up no tricks, just lift up. Take the cardboard that is left there and throw it out. Take the new roll and simply slip it through the rod in your hand and place it back on the the holder. The other type can be a bit ore tricky but believe me it can be done. What you need to do is place your hand on the bar holding the toilet paper and push it gently to the side and it will release itself from its holder.
Step four:
Just like the other holder, take cardboard off the rod and replace with new paper.
Step five:
Put the full roll on the rod and taking on side of the rod at a time simply place into the hole on the inside of the holder, follow this step on the other side and whola you are done.
Now some people like the paper beginning at the top while others on coming from the back. Personally, I just want the paper REPLACED!!!
Thank you, enjoy your day and remember to replace often
Sunday, May 30, 2010
No expiration
I took some time off not only from writing on here but honestly from life as well. I haven't given up wanting more and striving for more, however, the month of May has become a bitter pill to swallow for me. It is so hard to explain what that month does to me or the feelings that flow inside my skin. I really wish I could because I think that would make things so much easier not only on myself but those around me as well.
Expiration dates, they are on everything from the food we eat to our emotions. Like the dates on the food the dates for our emotions usually aren't chosen by ourselves either. How long does it take to mend a broken heart, miss the old neighborhood or get "over" someone you love that passed on? It seems the first question someone asks about a loved ones loss is how long ago was it? Like you are only allowed to feel if it was recently. How many times have you heard someone say or have you, yourself said, they need to "get over it"? Yes, I do feel you have to move forward and live your life or learn to live your new life without the benefit of this person or these people missing from your everyday. Somehow that just seems to take care of itself but the missing them, the going to pick up the phone because only they will understand how you feel, only to remember you cannot, doesn't seem to ever go away. I have managed to learn to live at times solely from denial while other times knowing full well the reality but still enjoying what or who is in front of me.
The question is; what is the expiration date on mourning? How long does it take to be able to think of these people and not truly not feel your throat close and your eyes start to burn? How long before your insides no longer feel like when you go over that hill in the country? No, it is not like that every day (anymore) but with that brings on its own set of guilt as does those genuine laughs, genuine excitement of what you are doing. Realizing it is alright to have a good time or to realize as Bruce says, "it's not a sin to be glad your alive."
Then May hits and I'm not glad to be alive, I'm not happy to be the only one left from my May trio. I'm not only not happy but it hurts like hell. I feel like my heart is actually going to explode from the burning. I don't not like being able to openly feel this way because the expiration of understanding has passed. I am not one to openly speak about my feelings anyway, actually I am usually one of the most private people you will come across. Then came the blog, haha, and now I am openly writing about things that I never, ever discuss. I guess all we can do is hold on, appreciate what and who is still here and love hard. I was afraid to get close after my trio was gone, in fact I pushed away many that tried. You know it's easier that way because then you will never feel this kind of pain again. Seemed like a pretty damn great plan to me, never going to feel this shit again.
Then my husband would grab my hand at just the right second without a word being said, and I knew I was safe, one of my kids would just look at me with the innocence that can only come from a child's eye, or give me a kiss on the forehead, the kind that is usually in reverse, one of my children of the heart would allow my love or trust in their life and I knew for sure that even if it wouldn't get easier, I would learn to live without two parts of my trio. There will never be an expiration on my grief and I will never get "over" it. I may never even be able to handle the month of May again, but I'm learning every day through my children (the ones that I gave birth to and the ones that are mine of heart) and my husband and many friends that loved me through it all that tomorrow comes and you smile, you laugh and you live.
Yes, we have all been here and will be here again but we will make it as will those that love us when we are the ones that are being mourned. If we did it right, then there will be a full circle of mourners smiling and remembering what we brought to their lives and we would have taught them and taught them well how to first and foremost love and to love fully, honestly and with entire heart, how to feel compassion, how to feel joy, how to feel and deal with sorrow, how to honor, how to be kind and hopefully how to live, how find their gifts and talents and use them in a positive manner but through it all LIVE, LOVE and yes even LAUGH.
thanks to all that have taught me my life lessons, especially Cackle. You have given me so much from a small child, a baby actually, until well into our adult life. Mainly you gave me the gift of always being time worthy. A gift that will always mean so very much to me. Being worthy of ones time no matter what is going on; knowing that you always picked up the phone, always made time to see me is priceless, you know the other gifts you gave you me as I know of the ones you felt I gifted you. Binch the vision of me through your eyes will always be unlike any others, the unconditional love extended to me will be with me always. Your gift of unconditional love helped make me the mother I am today. You were my first loves, my first life lessons and yes my first true heart break. I thank you both for helping making me. Rest in peace
Expiration dates, they are on everything from the food we eat to our emotions. Like the dates on the food the dates for our emotions usually aren't chosen by ourselves either. How long does it take to mend a broken heart, miss the old neighborhood or get "over" someone you love that passed on? It seems the first question someone asks about a loved ones loss is how long ago was it? Like you are only allowed to feel if it was recently. How many times have you heard someone say or have you, yourself said, they need to "get over it"? Yes, I do feel you have to move forward and live your life or learn to live your new life without the benefit of this person or these people missing from your everyday. Somehow that just seems to take care of itself but the missing them, the going to pick up the phone because only they will understand how you feel, only to remember you cannot, doesn't seem to ever go away. I have managed to learn to live at times solely from denial while other times knowing full well the reality but still enjoying what or who is in front of me.
The question is; what is the expiration date on mourning? How long does it take to be able to think of these people and not truly not feel your throat close and your eyes start to burn? How long before your insides no longer feel like when you go over that hill in the country? No, it is not like that every day (anymore) but with that brings on its own set of guilt as does those genuine laughs, genuine excitement of what you are doing. Realizing it is alright to have a good time or to realize as Bruce says, "it's not a sin to be glad your alive."
Then May hits and I'm not glad to be alive, I'm not happy to be the only one left from my May trio. I'm not only not happy but it hurts like hell. I feel like my heart is actually going to explode from the burning. I don't not like being able to openly feel this way because the expiration of understanding has passed. I am not one to openly speak about my feelings anyway, actually I am usually one of the most private people you will come across. Then came the blog, haha, and now I am openly writing about things that I never, ever discuss. I guess all we can do is hold on, appreciate what and who is still here and love hard. I was afraid to get close after my trio was gone, in fact I pushed away many that tried. You know it's easier that way because then you will never feel this kind of pain again. Seemed like a pretty damn great plan to me, never going to feel this shit again.
Then my husband would grab my hand at just the right second without a word being said, and I knew I was safe, one of my kids would just look at me with the innocence that can only come from a child's eye, or give me a kiss on the forehead, the kind that is usually in reverse, one of my children of the heart would allow my love or trust in their life and I knew for sure that even if it wouldn't get easier, I would learn to live without two parts of my trio. There will never be an expiration on my grief and I will never get "over" it. I may never even be able to handle the month of May again, but I'm learning every day through my children (the ones that I gave birth to and the ones that are mine of heart) and my husband and many friends that loved me through it all that tomorrow comes and you smile, you laugh and you live.
Yes, we have all been here and will be here again but we will make it as will those that love us when we are the ones that are being mourned. If we did it right, then there will be a full circle of mourners smiling and remembering what we brought to their lives and we would have taught them and taught them well how to first and foremost love and to love fully, honestly and with entire heart, how to feel compassion, how to feel joy, how to feel and deal with sorrow, how to honor, how to be kind and hopefully how to live, how find their gifts and talents and use them in a positive manner but through it all LIVE, LOVE and yes even LAUGH.
thanks to all that have taught me my life lessons, especially Cackle. You have given me so much from a small child, a baby actually, until well into our adult life. Mainly you gave me the gift of always being time worthy. A gift that will always mean so very much to me. Being worthy of ones time no matter what is going on; knowing that you always picked up the phone, always made time to see me is priceless, you know the other gifts you gave you me as I know of the ones you felt I gifted you. Binch the vision of me through your eyes will always be unlike any others, the unconditional love extended to me will be with me always. Your gift of unconditional love helped make me the mother I am today. You were my first loves, my first life lessons and yes my first true heart break. I thank you both for helping making me. Rest in peace
Monday, April 12, 2010
Riding the wagon once again
Hello my loyal followers (hahaha, OK me and maybe my mother)
I GOT THE POWER...(insert weight lifter grunt...cause I can't spell it, haha)
I won!! Well, sort of. The laundry baskets as well as the clothes in them are put away and not by me, so that is a win. I did however, have to go a little postal and got the deer in the headlight looks. Can you believe that? They looked at me like baskets? What baskets do you refer to old woman? Well not only are the baskets tucked away they had to clean the rest of the house while the old woman went out and took some pictures. Pay back's a bitch.
And I, my friends, am the Grand Marshall of the bitch parade!!
I wish you all a very successful and happy week. With the nice weather finally here and the windows now officially open, let's start hearing from some of you with your secret dreams. Let's see if we can make them happen. I didn't get my column as of yet, like I've stated a few hundred times, however, my pictures are in full swing and I will be doing stuff with them. Happiness starts with us and expressing what we need to make it happen.
Love to all
;0)
Friday, April 9, 2010
I didn't fall....I was pushed off the wagon
I know I posted that I wasn't going to hold grudges, etc, blah, blah, blah but I was weak at that moment and forgot how much my family annoys me. So a little note to my family........
Dear Family,
HELLO does anyone but me see the freaking laundry baskets in the freaking (no that isn't the word I really mean) hallway??? They are the ones in front of your bedroom doors with all the clean clothes in them. Kudo's to Kevin for bringing them up one flight after I did the other 2 and my mother helped me fold it.
I know you see it as you have all been digging through it for clothes to wear and now the nicely folded clothes are a mess. While I'm at it how about picking up the dirty ones in your room and would you all please stop putting that one dish in the sink right after I finished cleaning the kitchen!!!
This may sound like well at least they put it in the sink, but NOOOOO it sat in their rooms for God knows how long and when they heard the water running thought oh good if I sneak this one in maybe she will wash this one too and not realize it was in my room. Yeah I noticed the science project growing in your room but was too disgusted to attempt to touch it.
Oh and one more thing dear ones, STOP, I repeat, STOP putting empty containers back into the refrigerator!!!!!!!! Throw the thing away and yes we do have stuff to eat, you just don't like it (this week). Let me not forget the garbage no matter what Hefty says there really is only so much that can fit in one bag, so please stop playing hang on Harvey with the trash and replace the bag when it's full. Now to all you mother's out there laughing saying is she kidding me, does she really think this will happen? Of course I don't but in keeping with my new positive attitude in order not to go postal on them this weekend, I'm simply posting my grievances as stated in my last blog (if you don't say what bothers you, it cannot change and you should allow the person/people the opportunity to rectify their wrong doing). No this isn't news to them but the I'm sorry the baskets of laundry is where I am taking my stand, they will stay there for the rest of my life and the clothes being worn from them will NEVER do you hear me NEVER get washed again.
Oh and Cali, my dog and faithful companion, would you please get out of my way. Yes that includes when I get out of the shower and you insist on sitting in front of the door and blocking my path; only to be followed up by racing me to the basement door and down the stairs so I can bring my dirty clothes; actually every time I use any stairs please stop waiting for me to get halfway down so you can now have this burst of energy knock me out of you way so you can win the race; the middle of the night when I am getting up to pee, which happens every few minutes so you would think you would know by now to move and finally stop nugging me that big wet nose of yours when I finally do fall asleep to remind me that you are still there or to be pet. I know you are there I kill myself trying to climb over to go to the bathroom, REMEMBER.
Have a wonderful sunshine day!
Your loving,
Wife (Bill) and Mother (the rest of you)
OK, trying to catch the wagon so I can jump back on but it is gaining momentum away from me and these old legs don't run that fast. I will try though after all I put it out there no more grudges and the forgiveness tool is in the belt. I can't find the belt right now because I threw it out the window on my blinding anger but calm now and I will go look for it.
Carry on
Dear Family,
HELLO does anyone but me see the freaking laundry baskets in the freaking (no that isn't the word I really mean) hallway??? They are the ones in front of your bedroom doors with all the clean clothes in them. Kudo's to Kevin for bringing them up one flight after I did the other 2 and my mother helped me fold it.
I know you see it as you have all been digging through it for clothes to wear and now the nicely folded clothes are a mess. While I'm at it how about picking up the dirty ones in your room and would you all please stop putting that one dish in the sink right after I finished cleaning the kitchen!!!
This may sound like well at least they put it in the sink, but NOOOOO it sat in their rooms for God knows how long and when they heard the water running thought oh good if I sneak this one in maybe she will wash this one too and not realize it was in my room. Yeah I noticed the science project growing in your room but was too disgusted to attempt to touch it.
Oh and one more thing dear ones, STOP, I repeat, STOP putting empty containers back into the refrigerator!!!!!!!! Throw the thing away and yes we do have stuff to eat, you just don't like it (this week). Let me not forget the garbage no matter what Hefty says there really is only so much that can fit in one bag, so please stop playing hang on Harvey with the trash and replace the bag when it's full. Now to all you mother's out there laughing saying is she kidding me, does she really think this will happen? Of course I don't but in keeping with my new positive attitude in order not to go postal on them this weekend, I'm simply posting my grievances as stated in my last blog (if you don't say what bothers you, it cannot change and you should allow the person/people the opportunity to rectify their wrong doing). No this isn't news to them but the I'm sorry the baskets of laundry is where I am taking my stand, they will stay there for the rest of my life and the clothes being worn from them will NEVER do you hear me NEVER get washed again.
Oh and Cali, my dog and faithful companion, would you please get out of my way. Yes that includes when I get out of the shower and you insist on sitting in front of the door and blocking my path; only to be followed up by racing me to the basement door and down the stairs so I can bring my dirty clothes; actually every time I use any stairs please stop waiting for me to get halfway down so you can now have this burst of energy knock me out of you way so you can win the race; the middle of the night when I am getting up to pee, which happens every few minutes so you would think you would know by now to move and finally stop nugging me that big wet nose of yours when I finally do fall asleep to remind me that you are still there or to be pet. I know you are there I kill myself trying to climb over to go to the bathroom, REMEMBER.
Have a wonderful sunshine day!
Your loving,
Wife (Bill) and Mother (the rest of you)
OK, trying to catch the wagon so I can jump back on but it is gaining momentum away from me and these old legs don't run that fast. I will try though after all I put it out there no more grudges and the forgiveness tool is in the belt. I can't find the belt right now because I threw it out the window on my blinding anger but calm now and I will go look for it.
Carry on
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Spring has sprung...time for another tool in my tool belt
Yes spring has indeed sprung woo who. I am happy to report that the blog has inspired someone into not only starting their own blog but a new business as well. This made me so happy and in keeping with the whole idea of this blog being one of one hand helping the other. I would love it for all my readers to check out Beauty Brilliance. I will try to get a direct link onto an upcoming posting. So lets all give a great big boo ya to my girl, Lorraine.
Although I haven't received my own success in receiving a column the fact that someone is moving forward brings a new hope. I haven't tried again to get the column, I haven't revamped what we spoke about and I haven't contacted them with some of my other ideas. They showed interest and I am responsible solely for dropping the ball. I say this only to take responsibility for my part in why I am now column stagnant. I am disappointed however I am not crushed or defeated. I have made progress in other areas of my life and I have picked up my neglected camera and that always puts things into perspective..
I have been taking a real hard look at myself in order to do my best to find self truth and I have discovered my tool that I will be putting in my fictitious tool belt. Forgiveness this might be the toughest tool of all. I realized that harboring grudges toward people are not only pointless but weigh me down with unneeded burdens. Carrying a grudge truly serves no purpose in my life and I know it is truly time to let any and all grudges go. As of this writing I am angry with no one and I have to say I feel a freedom I haven't felt in some time. During my discovery I realized that I too have hurt people in my life and whether it be long ago or recently I know it was not intentional and therefore have to give others the same benefit of the doubt and say maybe they didn't mean it either. If they did then really are they worth the burden it brings to my life? I honestly don't think so; actually I know they are not based on the release the forgiveness has brought to my life. Having said that I would have to say in all honesty when I chose to speak ill of someone that was not unintentional hurt and I'm sure that that is not the only unintentional hurt that I have caused. Most of it was from immaturity and thankfully I have grown so I have to think those that have hurt me in that manner have grown with age too.
I figure what better time to let it go then spring. As I look around at all the beauty and new growth that springtime brings I just want to embrace it and keep that feeling. Corny I know, but honestly it feels really good, good like the tranquility of walking through a garden in the sunshine. You know that peace you feel when you do that, that is how I feel...honestly.
I know this tool is the hardest tool of all; not only to come to pass but to endure. If you are alive and speak to people they are going to piss you off but my thinking is if it is bad enough that I feel I can't let it go shouldn't I give the person the benefit of conversation? Aren't we both worth knowing their actions or words upset me. If I don't say anything than I do not have the right to be mad or upset. After all how can they or I make immense with someone if they don't tell me I was hurtful to them or they to me? Basically, all I am saying is people make mistakes some worse than others but it is up to us to decide if it is a cut through the heart hurt or just a stupid moment in time. How many times have you either said or heard I can't even remember what I am mad at? I know I have thought it and I know I have heard it. If that is the case how bad could it have been? The cut through the heart hurt to me is even more important to try and forgive so that it can be released because those are the ones that stifles the one that was hurt. It is all you can think about, it makes you bitter, might make you doubt yourself whatever the feeling I can assure you it isn't anything positive. So why bring it with you, put it down and leave it there. It is hard this I know but at its hardest point you need to look within yourself and ask yourself am I guilt free? Have I caused the deep pain to someone else? I don't think there is anyone out there that can say they have never hurt someone really bad.
I know I personally will fall off the forgiveness wagon, I know I will take part in the gossip train (I hate and yet I am guilty of participating) and I know I will also fall off the petty wagon as well. I pray that I jump back on and jump quickly if for no other reason than if I continue to look backward I cannot move forward. I would like to think that won't be my only reason for doing this, I would like to think that now that I am older I am a little wiser and have a better understanding of human nature and that people truly do make mistakes. I have forgiven and I have also released people that have added no value to my life and that I cannot add value to theirs. Am I angry with these people, not at all (really no joke, I am not), just smarter enough to know when it is time to say good bye. And basically that is just that; when you add no value and they add no value, if you cringe when they call maybe you shouldn't pretend to be their friend. They deserve better and so do you/I. If I add nothing to your life and you really don't want to hang out with me, don't really want talk to me, if I annoy you, then no hard feelings let me go.
I asked to be told how you view me and now I am asking to be told if I have hurt you, let me know. If I owe you an apology you will receive it and it will be genuine. If you cannot forgive it I will respect it.
Forgiveness put snugly into my tool belt and I am happy to have it there. At the very least posting it on here definitely will help keep me grounded because I now put it out there. ;)
Once again a huge round of applause to Lorraine and best wishes on her new venture. If anyone wants a facial, needs advice on good skin, beauty products, what clothes works best for their body whatever, I have the girl for you. Congratulations my little sideliner you are officially now a lifeliner.
Although I haven't received my own success in receiving a column the fact that someone is moving forward brings a new hope. I haven't tried again to get the column, I haven't revamped what we spoke about and I haven't contacted them with some of my other ideas. They showed interest and I am responsible solely for dropping the ball. I say this only to take responsibility for my part in why I am now column stagnant. I am disappointed however I am not crushed or defeated. I have made progress in other areas of my life and I have picked up my neglected camera and that always puts things into perspective..
I have been taking a real hard look at myself in order to do my best to find self truth and I have discovered my tool that I will be putting in my fictitious tool belt. Forgiveness this might be the toughest tool of all. I realized that harboring grudges toward people are not only pointless but weigh me down with unneeded burdens. Carrying a grudge truly serves no purpose in my life and I know it is truly time to let any and all grudges go. As of this writing I am angry with no one and I have to say I feel a freedom I haven't felt in some time. During my discovery I realized that I too have hurt people in my life and whether it be long ago or recently I know it was not intentional and therefore have to give others the same benefit of the doubt and say maybe they didn't mean it either. If they did then really are they worth the burden it brings to my life? I honestly don't think so; actually I know they are not based on the release the forgiveness has brought to my life. Having said that I would have to say in all honesty when I chose to speak ill of someone that was not unintentional hurt and I'm sure that that is not the only unintentional hurt that I have caused. Most of it was from immaturity and thankfully I have grown so I have to think those that have hurt me in that manner have grown with age too.
I figure what better time to let it go then spring. As I look around at all the beauty and new growth that springtime brings I just want to embrace it and keep that feeling. Corny I know, but honestly it feels really good, good like the tranquility of walking through a garden in the sunshine. You know that peace you feel when you do that, that is how I feel...honestly.
I know this tool is the hardest tool of all; not only to come to pass but to endure. If you are alive and speak to people they are going to piss you off but my thinking is if it is bad enough that I feel I can't let it go shouldn't I give the person the benefit of conversation? Aren't we both worth knowing their actions or words upset me. If I don't say anything than I do not have the right to be mad or upset. After all how can they or I make immense with someone if they don't tell me I was hurtful to them or they to me? Basically, all I am saying is people make mistakes some worse than others but it is up to us to decide if it is a cut through the heart hurt or just a stupid moment in time. How many times have you either said or heard I can't even remember what I am mad at? I know I have thought it and I know I have heard it. If that is the case how bad could it have been? The cut through the heart hurt to me is even more important to try and forgive so that it can be released because those are the ones that stifles the one that was hurt. It is all you can think about, it makes you bitter, might make you doubt yourself whatever the feeling I can assure you it isn't anything positive. So why bring it with you, put it down and leave it there. It is hard this I know but at its hardest point you need to look within yourself and ask yourself am I guilt free? Have I caused the deep pain to someone else? I don't think there is anyone out there that can say they have never hurt someone really bad.
I know I personally will fall off the forgiveness wagon, I know I will take part in the gossip train (I hate and yet I am guilty of participating) and I know I will also fall off the petty wagon as well. I pray that I jump back on and jump quickly if for no other reason than if I continue to look backward I cannot move forward. I would like to think that won't be my only reason for doing this, I would like to think that now that I am older I am a little wiser and have a better understanding of human nature and that people truly do make mistakes. I have forgiven and I have also released people that have added no value to my life and that I cannot add value to theirs. Am I angry with these people, not at all (really no joke, I am not), just smarter enough to know when it is time to say good bye. And basically that is just that; when you add no value and they add no value, if you cringe when they call maybe you shouldn't pretend to be their friend. They deserve better and so do you/I. If I add nothing to your life and you really don't want to hang out with me, don't really want talk to me, if I annoy you, then no hard feelings let me go.
I asked to be told how you view me and now I am asking to be told if I have hurt you, let me know. If I owe you an apology you will receive it and it will be genuine. If you cannot forgive it I will respect it.
Forgiveness put snugly into my tool belt and I am happy to have it there. At the very least posting it on here definitely will help keep me grounded because I now put it out there. ;)
Once again a huge round of applause to Lorraine and best wishes on her new venture. If anyone wants a facial, needs advice on good skin, beauty products, what clothes works best for their body whatever, I have the girl for you. Congratulations my little sideliner you are officially now a lifeliner.
Friday, March 26, 2010
The Joys Of Wonder.....
bread that is. Like my youth and whatever looks I MAY have ever possessed the days of eating good ole white bread and for that matter anything white are gone.
This is for the This and That blog:
Coming off of a very emotionally draining 2 weeks has made me long for the simpler times and what a better place to go then back to my youth. The days when everyone looked good in a bathing suit (at least through the eyes of a child), your age included 1/2's, and for me my biggest worry was whether to swim, ride bikes or play stick ball/kickball. Ah stick ball/kickball that was a game myself and some neighborhood kids "invented." It was a great game we took 2 of our favorite games and combined them. Genius!! Truly genius. We painted the bases in the street..those were the days where you could get a can of spray paint anytime you wanted. Hmm maybe we are the reason it is under lock and key now. Anyway, like I was saying, we painted the bases in the street along with the almighty home run line. Only the best players could knock one over the home run line or my brother and Ricky. Everyone wanted to hit the almighty home run because once you did my brother painted your name behind the home run line and for every one after that he made some kind of mark. I was so determined to get into the H.R. hall of fame, man did I want in. I would be damned if Jimmy and Ricky were going to be the only 2 names in the hall of fame. So finally one day I take my turn at the plate, grasp my fingers around that stick ball bat and Jimmy is on the pitchers mound our eyes met and he gave me his death glare as if to say "you're going down little girl." This may work on the others little fella but not me. When he threw the kickball my very trained eye (thanks to him) watched that ball leave his hand and I followed it until the ball and my bat met. Oh YES!! I sent that ball sailing not only to the H.R. line but well past the line. I'm pretty sure the heavens opened and the angels were singing when I cracked that ball over both Jimmy and Ricky's heads. Seriously, I believe I saw the heavens open up and I heard the angels singing in my honor. I was a good sport though, I ran around those bases like any mature athlete would. OOOK, maybe that isn't entirely how I ran, perhaps I swaggered around the bases and smiled at my brother as I rounded the bases but I did it in the most mature way. Hey have you forgotten the death glare that screamed LITTLE GIRL. That'll show him little girl, on your knees bro and paint my name with honor of knowing you threw the pitch big boy. I'm sure he was proud of me though, deep, deep, deep down I'm telling you he was proud of me after all he was my gym teacher. Anything to do with sports he was there, oh the memories of my loving brother yelling to me throw that ball like a girl one more time and I will beat your ass. Alright then so you say put my fingers across the laces like so and pull my arm back at an angle behind my head with my elbow pointing forward you say. I may not be describing the throw properly on here but trust me when I tell you that boy would have beat my ass and therefore I could throw a spiral better then most boys on the football team. My talents didn't end there either, my loving brother taught me how to play baseball, lacrosse and basketball. I could play well enough to play with the boys without any complaints. He would make them let me play anyway but he didn't want to be embarrassed so I had to play well. No I had to be better then at least some of them. What I found out though when you play with boys you usually wind up fighting with boys and luckily my brother had me well trained in this area too. Let's just say there were a lot of ass kickings before I got the full spiral, dribble and proper way to throw a baseball down. Hitting the ball in baseball was never a problem just looked at his face and aimed. Of course that part is our little secret. Nah he wasn't that bad, although what I wrote is true he did always watch out for me and he did teach me well and he did beat my ass. To this day he brags about me being the second strongest in my entire grade in elementary school second only to a guy that had our same last name so it was cool. I don't hold the same pride with that part of the story as he does but a fact is a fact and now you know my dirty little secret. Had he went to middle school and high school with me I don't think he would be so proud. Short and sweet, I became a wimp. I didn't care though I still had back up when I needed it. And for those I needed it for you know who you are and shame on you.
This little visit back to the days of my youth in the good ole 70's definitely was a needed escape. The only thing that could top this visit would be a pb & j sandwich on wonder bread with a cold glass of milk. The pure joy a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on wonder bread (peanut butter on the top). It was the perfect chaser to a fun packed morning. Makes me all warm and fuzzy inside with the exception of the day that broke my heart. My aunt yells out her back window what do I want for lunch and my response was the same as everyday pb & j peanut butter on the top. I go in when it's ready sit down ready to dig in when to my horror the jelly is on the top. I panic because I'm afraid to tell her that I can't eat this. Thankfully I wear my emotions or at least it was good in this case because she asked, "what's wrong?" I respond with, "well, I don't mean to be rude but I like it with the peanut butter on the top, it has to be like that cause I don't like jelly that much." So you know what this _______ did, she flip my sandwich over. Helloooo let me say this slowly for you. The sandwich has to be made with the peanut butter on the top. This is a jelly sandwich that you flipped. Worst part she outed my mother and told me believe me your mother makes it the same way. Again lady don't want to be rude but obviously you know nothing because if you did we wouldn't even be having this conversation. So later when I was having my nightly phone chat with my mother when I asked her about this, you know what she did. She freaking giggled and said yeah all you have to do is turn the sandwich so the peanut butter is on the top. You know what I can't even finish the story it is way too painful to relive.
Going to my happy place where they only make the sandwich from the start where the peanut butter is on the TOP.
This is for the This and That blog:
Coming off of a very emotionally draining 2 weeks has made me long for the simpler times and what a better place to go then back to my youth. The days when everyone looked good in a bathing suit (at least through the eyes of a child), your age included 1/2's, and for me my biggest worry was whether to swim, ride bikes or play stick ball/kickball. Ah stick ball/kickball that was a game myself and some neighborhood kids "invented." It was a great game we took 2 of our favorite games and combined them. Genius!! Truly genius. We painted the bases in the street..those were the days where you could get a can of spray paint anytime you wanted. Hmm maybe we are the reason it is under lock and key now. Anyway, like I was saying, we painted the bases in the street along with the almighty home run line. Only the best players could knock one over the home run line or my brother and Ricky. Everyone wanted to hit the almighty home run because once you did my brother painted your name behind the home run line and for every one after that he made some kind of mark. I was so determined to get into the H.R. hall of fame, man did I want in. I would be damned if Jimmy and Ricky were going to be the only 2 names in the hall of fame. So finally one day I take my turn at the plate, grasp my fingers around that stick ball bat and Jimmy is on the pitchers mound our eyes met and he gave me his death glare as if to say "you're going down little girl." This may work on the others little fella but not me. When he threw the kickball my very trained eye (thanks to him) watched that ball leave his hand and I followed it until the ball and my bat met. Oh YES!! I sent that ball sailing not only to the H.R. line but well past the line. I'm pretty sure the heavens opened and the angels were singing when I cracked that ball over both Jimmy and Ricky's heads. Seriously, I believe I saw the heavens open up and I heard the angels singing in my honor. I was a good sport though, I ran around those bases like any mature athlete would. OOOK, maybe that isn't entirely how I ran, perhaps I swaggered around the bases and smiled at my brother as I rounded the bases but I did it in the most mature way. Hey have you forgotten the death glare that screamed LITTLE GIRL. That'll show him little girl, on your knees bro and paint my name with honor of knowing you threw the pitch big boy. I'm sure he was proud of me though, deep, deep, deep down I'm telling you he was proud of me after all he was my gym teacher. Anything to do with sports he was there, oh the memories of my loving brother yelling to me throw that ball like a girl one more time and I will beat your ass. Alright then so you say put my fingers across the laces like so and pull my arm back at an angle behind my head with my elbow pointing forward you say. I may not be describing the throw properly on here but trust me when I tell you that boy would have beat my ass and therefore I could throw a spiral better then most boys on the football team. My talents didn't end there either, my loving brother taught me how to play baseball, lacrosse and basketball. I could play well enough to play with the boys without any complaints. He would make them let me play anyway but he didn't want to be embarrassed so I had to play well. No I had to be better then at least some of them. What I found out though when you play with boys you usually wind up fighting with boys and luckily my brother had me well trained in this area too. Let's just say there were a lot of ass kickings before I got the full spiral, dribble and proper way to throw a baseball down. Hitting the ball in baseball was never a problem just looked at his face and aimed. Of course that part is our little secret. Nah he wasn't that bad, although what I wrote is true he did always watch out for me and he did teach me well and he did beat my ass. To this day he brags about me being the second strongest in my entire grade in elementary school second only to a guy that had our same last name so it was cool. I don't hold the same pride with that part of the story as he does but a fact is a fact and now you know my dirty little secret. Had he went to middle school and high school with me I don't think he would be so proud. Short and sweet, I became a wimp. I didn't care though I still had back up when I needed it. And for those I needed it for you know who you are and shame on you.
This little visit back to the days of my youth in the good ole 70's definitely was a needed escape. The only thing that could top this visit would be a pb & j sandwich on wonder bread with a cold glass of milk. The pure joy a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on wonder bread (peanut butter on the top). It was the perfect chaser to a fun packed morning. Makes me all warm and fuzzy inside with the exception of the day that broke my heart. My aunt yells out her back window what do I want for lunch and my response was the same as everyday pb & j peanut butter on the top. I go in when it's ready sit down ready to dig in when to my horror the jelly is on the top. I panic because I'm afraid to tell her that I can't eat this. Thankfully I wear my emotions or at least it was good in this case because she asked, "what's wrong?" I respond with, "well, I don't mean to be rude but I like it with the peanut butter on the top, it has to be like that cause I don't like jelly that much." So you know what this _______ did, she flip my sandwich over. Helloooo let me say this slowly for you. The sandwich has to be made with the peanut butter on the top. This is a jelly sandwich that you flipped. Worst part she outed my mother and told me believe me your mother makes it the same way. Again lady don't want to be rude but obviously you know nothing because if you did we wouldn't even be having this conversation. So later when I was having my nightly phone chat with my mother when I asked her about this, you know what she did. She freaking giggled and said yeah all you have to do is turn the sandwich so the peanut butter is on the top. You know what I can't even finish the story it is way too painful to relive.
Going to my happy place where they only make the sandwich from the start where the peanut butter is on the TOP.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
comments
I've been told by many of you that you aren't able to leave comments. I have checked the settings and you should be able to post a comment even if you are not a google member. Not sure what the problem is but if you try to comment and still can't, please let me know again and I will find out what the issue is. Thank you for reading and trying so hard to comment. Funny how you all seem even more determined to post now that I posted the honesty blog. Just saying.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Not ready for prime time player
Acceptance and reality can be bitter pills to swallow my faithful followers. In my case accepting that now is not the time for a column with my name on it. Although I wish it were I do understand that for whatever reason it isn't going to happen today. Still hanging in there for tomorrow though.
Reassurance and love is what keeps us going. Thankfully today I have photography and the peace that comes from deep inside me when I hold my camera. I don't know why or how but just the touch of my camera brings me comfort. Even in my darkest hours being behind that lens somehow makes me feel like all is well. There is nothing like the rush of capturing a moment that just can't be redone; capturing the person that hates being photographed and having them be OK with their picture, possibly for the first time. There is nothing like looking at the world with the eyes that want to reveal something new in what is seen every day. And the separation it allows when in a situation that is just too hard to bear.
I accept that I am not ready to write my own column and may never be, I am reassured at the mere fact that they were interested in an unknown like me and the reality is I will always have photography because deep inside my soul that is my first love. Maybe one day this unknown will have her name in lights or in this case print but until then I am thankful for the peace I find in my hobby and for the family and friends that pose for me endlessly.
Only time will tell what is in store for us my followers, so glad that you chose to take this ride together.
Reassurance and love is what keeps us going. Thankfully today I have photography and the peace that comes from deep inside me when I hold my camera. I don't know why or how but just the touch of my camera brings me comfort. Even in my darkest hours being behind that lens somehow makes me feel like all is well. There is nothing like the rush of capturing a moment that just can't be redone; capturing the person that hates being photographed and having them be OK with their picture, possibly for the first time. There is nothing like looking at the world with the eyes that want to reveal something new in what is seen every day. And the separation it allows when in a situation that is just too hard to bear.
I accept that I am not ready to write my own column and may never be, I am reassured at the mere fact that they were interested in an unknown like me and the reality is I will always have photography because deep inside my soul that is my first love. Maybe one day this unknown will have her name in lights or in this case print but until then I am thankful for the peace I find in my hobby and for the family and friends that pose for me endlessly.
Only time will tell what is in store for us my followers, so glad that you chose to take this ride together.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
lipstick safetly put in tool belt (SL to LL)
In this pledge for self improvement it occurred to me that lipstick may not possess enough power on it's own. I think I may need more tools than just that. I am not doubting the power of the lipstick (cough, cough) and although I'm sure these women of a certain age definitely have a point. In order to feel good, you must look good. I get it and there is truth in that. When you feel good about a certain outfit, hairstyle whatever you do seem to have more confidence that day or a little skip in your step. See I really did get it. It just isn't enough.
Therefore, I am mulling over what other tools will be needed in order to move forward and what occurred to me this morning was honesty is crucial. Not honesty toward others (although that would be nice) I am referring here to honesty on who we really are. Yes folks that is what I mean, not what we want to believe but the actual what we put out there who we really are. No excuses, no sugar coating the whole enchilada of what and who we are. Scary yes so only enter if you dare hear your ugly truth. (Opens door ever so slightly, peeks head into what appears to be very dark room. Standing here scared out of my mind what ugly truth awaits for me, I ask myself , "Do I dare enter?"
I was listening to someones version on who they are and holy shit, uh NO! This person saw them self as giving, low self esteem, truly self sacrificing. Oh my God, are you serious? Now if this person were to ask me (and all that know this person) how I (or the world at large) view this person, would I tell the truth? The truth, honest to God is that this person is a selfish bitch and very honestly an attention whore. You know the kind good or bad it doesn't matter as long as you are focused on this person. As long as honesty is the focus here then truth be told, this persons truth isn't really important in my growth but my own self truth, however, is. I included this only to give an example of why this tool is essential, not to focus on this person's self image.
How do I see myself in comparison to what other people see? Is it possible to move on without that knowledge? I honestly don't think so. I think we need to know truly how we are perceived by others. Truth hurts, this I know but if it makes me better, if it helps me obtain my goals and dreams isn't it worth hearing? I know in my heart I would have loved to tell this person how everyone I know reads them and it is nothing like they see but I won't. Makes me ask myself why not? OK, this person didn't ask for my opinion so I can take the coward way out and use that but had they, would I and would they really hear me anyway? NOPE to would I and can't say for sure without giving them the benefit of the truth if they would listen but it is doubtful.
I really do want to know what people feel about me but unless it is anonymous nobody is going to tell the truth. Question is how do you get the question out there anonymously? I can say if you read this please drop it in my mailbox, comment on here without leaving your name. Kind of setting myself up there to hear I'm a bitch in public but who the heck is actually reading this anyway? I know this will be the one that everyone reads and decides to comment on, just to let me know that I too am a selfish bitch. Actually if that is the case I really do want to know. Listening to that person really made me wonder, how far off we are from seeing ourselves to what is really there.
I really would like to do a study on this and have people write down how they view themselves and then have people that know them, write down (anonymously) how they see them. I'm not saying that what other people see are entirely accurate either but I would like to see if it is even close.
So this tool for my belt will be much harder then the lipstick as it isn't found in a store. I can ask the few I trust that I believe will tell me the truth and on occasion have; compare it to what I see. That is OK for a start but I need a two way mirror like they use when wanting an opinion on a product; only this will be about how I am perceived by others.
In accordance with my last post regarding a daily thank you note, today's note will be public.
I am grateful that I am open to hearing what people have to say in such an open forum as this. I am thankful that I am willing to change what needs to be changed and I am thankful for those that choose to partake in helping me with my growth. Go easy people, I'm open to it but still human and breathing so don't go for the jugular. ;)
isn't this a pretty font color for my thank you note, only a loving, kind, generous, self sacrificing person would think to use such a pretty font, NO? Haha...awaiting the truth.
Therefore, I am mulling over what other tools will be needed in order to move forward and what occurred to me this morning was honesty is crucial. Not honesty toward others (although that would be nice) I am referring here to honesty on who we really are. Yes folks that is what I mean, not what we want to believe but the actual what we put out there who we really are. No excuses, no sugar coating the whole enchilada of what and who we are. Scary yes so only enter if you dare hear your ugly truth. (Opens door ever so slightly, peeks head into what appears to be very dark room. Standing here scared out of my mind what ugly truth awaits for me, I ask myself , "Do I dare enter?"
I was listening to someones version on who they are and holy shit, uh NO! This person saw them self as giving, low self esteem, truly self sacrificing. Oh my God, are you serious? Now if this person were to ask me (and all that know this person) how I (or the world at large) view this person, would I tell the truth? The truth, honest to God is that this person is a selfish bitch and very honestly an attention whore. You know the kind good or bad it doesn't matter as long as you are focused on this person. As long as honesty is the focus here then truth be told, this persons truth isn't really important in my growth but my own self truth, however, is. I included this only to give an example of why this tool is essential, not to focus on this person's self image.
How do I see myself in comparison to what other people see? Is it possible to move on without that knowledge? I honestly don't think so. I think we need to know truly how we are perceived by others. Truth hurts, this I know but if it makes me better, if it helps me obtain my goals and dreams isn't it worth hearing? I know in my heart I would have loved to tell this person how everyone I know reads them and it is nothing like they see but I won't. Makes me ask myself why not? OK, this person didn't ask for my opinion so I can take the coward way out and use that but had they, would I and would they really hear me anyway? NOPE to would I and can't say for sure without giving them the benefit of the truth if they would listen but it is doubtful.I really do want to know what people feel about me but unless it is anonymous nobody is going to tell the truth. Question is how do you get the question out there anonymously? I can say if you read this please drop it in my mailbox, comment on here without leaving your name. Kind of setting myself up there to hear I'm a bitch in public but who the heck is actually reading this anyway? I know this will be the one that everyone reads and decides to comment on, just to let me know that I too am a selfish bitch. Actually if that is the case I really do want to know. Listening to that person really made me wonder, how far off we are from seeing ourselves to what is really there.
I really would like to do a study on this and have people write down how they view themselves and then have people that know them, write down (anonymously) how they see them. I'm not saying that what other people see are entirely accurate either but I would like to see if it is even close.
So this tool for my belt will be much harder then the lipstick as it isn't found in a store. I can ask the few I trust that I believe will tell me the truth and on occasion have; compare it to what I see. That is OK for a start but I need a two way mirror like they use when wanting an opinion on a product; only this will be about how I am perceived by others.
In accordance with my last post regarding a daily thank you note, today's note will be public.
I am grateful that I am open to hearing what people have to say in such an open forum as this. I am thankful that I am willing to change what needs to be changed and I am thankful for those that choose to partake in helping me with my growth. Go easy people, I'm open to it but still human and breathing so don't go for the jugular. ;)
isn't this a pretty font color for my thank you note, only a loving, kind, generous, self sacrificing person would think to use such a pretty font, NO? Haha...awaiting the truth.
Friday, March 12, 2010
This and That
Announcing my 4th follower..hollar!! Let's get it started in here, let's get it started in har! Thank you Linda for signing on. Feel free to chime in any time. I would warn you that I tend to go off course, A LOT, but you have been the benefactor of many a conversation with me and already know that. Wait what was my point, hahaha. I like to call them my Edith Bunker moments.
I was truly hoping to have a blog that was interactive and that we could help one another reach some goals. I know it's corny but hey once you reach a certain stage in life (not an age a stage) we tend to accept what is; instead what can truly be. I was hoping that this would be a safety zone for everyone to openly announce said wishes and not only receive the peace that comes with setting the dream free but the real dream was that someone here would read it and know of a way to make that possible and so on. I guess you could say a pay it forward kind of thing. Although I have received some very positive feedback I have received only one comment (yay Amy and thank you btw what you said was beautiful). I know blogs are really just the writers voice and not necessarily a conversation but that was my intent.
Not ready to let that go but also facing the fact that I am in the room alone I've decided to break my blog into two parts. Kind of like a fork in the road. One direction will be the sideliners to lifeliners as I am truly trying to improve myself and the other will be called this and that. Basically that will just be my rambles about nonsense and whatever happens to be on my mind. I know very dangerous. Of course everyone is welcome to leave a comment on either but this way when I'm partying alone in my blog room it won't seem so odd. Although I do like to hear myself ramble I'm still not sure about these blogs. I feel like what is the point? Who the hell are we actually talking to and what are you supposed to talk about? I feel like it was created by someone with a major me complex or someone that just wants to chat but not necessarily hear what anyone wants to say. Or is it suppose to be like an open diary? Either way not sure I get it but sticking with the advice of my co-worker I keep writing.
Tonight I am going to lean more to the Sideliners to Lifeliners theme. During work today I was reading a book (yes that is what I do at work, read books, write and basically anything that makes the time move along). Anyway, I only read the first chapter but I have to say it really hit home with me. It was about 2 sisters that were forced to live in a Nazi camp because they were caught trying to help some Jewish people. Anyway, they had decided everyday that they would would say what they are thankful for. Somehow they were able to smuggle in their Bible and one morning Betsie, one of the sisters, read the Bible a verse in 1 Thessalonians 5:18 that said, "Give thanks in all circumstances." Everyday these sisters followed what they read and gave thanks. As it became harder to find things that they were thankful for Betsie began to give thanks for the fleas that were truly eating their bodies. Her sister was appalled by this and yelled at her, "how can you say thank you for the fleas?" Her response was simply God said, "in all circumstances". This is the very short story of their life there but I believe it says it all.
Needless to say, this touched me and touched me deeply. Within the last two days I had received some news that shook me. One about a friend and one about a young boys passing that is only 21 years old. As of this writing I am unable to give thanks for these circumstances but after that reading I needed to find something to give thanks for and I will before nights end.
The only way to move forward is to remain hopeful and as positive as you possibly can in all circumstances. So my fellow Sideliners and hopefully my inspirational Lifeliners here is my thought. Every morning start the day with a thank you note. Find as many things as you can to say thank you for. If you don't believe in God or you are struggling so deeply right now and are not speaking with God, write the note to yourself or someone that you are including in your thanks. You don't actually have to give it the thank you note to anyone it is in the writing of it that is important. This is not a new concept or even my own. Just one that I believe is necessary in order to improve oneself or even to really know true happiness. If you think about it there is some truth in that. Think about how you feel at the first sign of spring. Doesn't a good feeling come over you and you automatically feel more motivated. There is something about the windows being opened and the clear air coming in that makes you want have things in order, go out and walk, play with the kids whatever. How do you feel when someone does a kind gesture for you without reason? The thank you note to whoever is just that a kind gesture only to yourself. The positive mood and joy it will bring knowing that you have something to be thankful for will help start your day in a more empowering way. When you feel joy you don't want to sit still you want either share it, go out, whatever. It truly is empowering and that is the very thing you need to make a fantasy a reality. You need to empower yourself and believe that you are worth the time.
What Betsie and her sister didn't know at the time was the reason she was able to smuggle the Bible and spend all that time there without it being discovered. You see the soldiers routinely searched everyone's very crowded rooms but their room was never not once searched. Reason being was the fleas. The soldiers didn't want to go into the room because it was so over taken with the fleas they didn't want to get any on them. God sent the fleas to protect these girls.
I don't know why their any sick children, I don't know why my friend died of cancer ever let alone so damn young leaving behind young children and family that loves her, and I don't know why my brother had to pass as well. These deaths left and life long outstanding size hole in my heart. I don't know why any child has to face death at such young ages as so many do. I don't know why my two friends have to watch their beautiful babies be sick day in and day out and I don't know why my friend must endure more suffering. And I don't know why my son's friend had to loose his brother to an accident that now leaves his cousin struggling for his life as I write. This week also brought news that my mother's friend will pass any moment and my aunt was rushed into surgery. Although to most of us, especially knowing of this young mans passing it is a death in due time, I feel his wife of 50 years may disagree. I don't know why others, although I wouldn't wish any of this on them, go through life with what seems to the outside pretty much struggle free. I can go and on about things I don't understand, won't understand and will never find the thank you in those circumstances. I will however, try to write my thank you note every day for the blessing that I do have and I sincerely hope you the reader will do the same. My wish for you the reader is that God (yes I still believe) grants you with much to write in your thank you note.
One last thought to leave you with; some are from me some were spoken to me:
Tears were created to teach us compassion.
Fear was created to teach us security
Hate was created to teach us love
Enemies were created to teach us friendship
Sickness was created to show appreciation for health and to gift us the emotion of concern and care for others as well as the power of touch.
It was all created so that we will know the peace, joy and euphoria of heaven. I don't know that I can truly embrace all the sentiments written above tonight but I truly hope that those I love that are suffering tonight whether it be from illness, loss, loneliness or whatever sadness they are feeling are also being given the love, peace, friendship and hopefully very soon the healing. For those that have passed too soon as well as in proper time are embracing euphoric that has been promised in heaven. May you all rest in peace and know that until everyone is together wherever you are, my world heaven but for those who may not believe wherever you feel your loved ones are; here back on earth you are missed greatly.
Sideliners we never know what is around the corner, all you know for sure is right now so lets please help one another make right now as euphoric as can be down here. When you see a tear wipe it, when you know there is loneliness make time and where you know there is a dream help embrace it, don't laugh at it help make it happen.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Grateful for lessons learned.....(from my insomniatic twin)
I had a very interesting telephone conversation with a friend the other night. This friend was saying to me that she is worried about bills, etc. Nothing too bad, just worried about where we are all heading financially. Then she said something that really got me. She said "On one hand, I am so glad that we are going through this, because maybe we can all learn a lesson from this and pull back on crazy spending." I couldn't believe she said this because I had just the same thing to my husband very recently.
I was just telling him that I am actually kind of grateful that we aren't doing as well as we were because it reminds us that it isn't always going to be there and to appreciate the small things that are now so unappreciated. Stupid things like singing in a car, watching a television show all together in one room. You know, like we did in the old days when everyone didn't have their own televisions in their bedrooms. Actually, we did when I was growing up, but my parents used to have family nights and when would all watch together. We would put on an OTB channel or something like that with horse racing and my father would make his famous "7-up floats" and we would bet on the races. Not with actual money, or if we did we used coins. It truly was so much fun. After that my father would usually break into an impromptu game of Let's Make a Deal with your winnings. Man, that game drove me crazy. I guess you can say I don't like to lose so the fear of the inevitable zonk drove me insane.
Anyway, I am hoping things turn around, of course, but I hope that when it does, some things will remain the same. I really thought that I didn't indulge my kids, and actually, for today's standards I really don't. Who set these standards and why did we all, or at least why did I jump on board? I'm not in any way saying my children don't deserve nice things or that other children don't deserve nice things. With my son I always tried to go with advice that was given to me when he was young. Basically, what I was told is not to give him so much that he can't succeed on his own later in life. I didn't agree at first, my response was doesn't he deserve the best I can afford him? He was a product of the "flash card babies", and the "signing them up for nursery school before they were born" generation. So the fact that I spent as much as some colleges were getting for nursery school was not unheard of. Well, to me it was, but his Godmother talked me into it. Again, it was the Yuppie parenting days so I felt I couldn't let him start life at a disadvantage. I guess everything goes in cycles, he was raised with the "must have the best education," and "walk first, talk first" super babies generation. I am happy to say I didn't partake in the rest of the BS. Although I did want him to have a great start education wise. I don't know that having a good start necessarily entails what he learned. It may have been a bit much. For example, I don't feel a 2 1/2 year needs to know the chambers of the heart, be able to put a complete human skeleton together and name all the bones, speak Spanish and all the other things they taught him to do. They did teach him to read and read well, so for that I am grateful. Maybe it's me but taking your child out of their car seat and away from playing so they can learn these things is a bit much to say the least. For those of you that are raising your children now are most likely gasping at what I spent and what he was learning and that parents were signing children yet to be born up for private schools but we are the same parents buying $100 boots for young girls. And forget about the bags they are carrying!! I know we are all now saying, "oh it's not a real bag." Well, then why have it, why not just say, "Sorry we can't afford it." or "You are not a Hilton, thank God!" Do the girls today really need the items we are buying them any more than those poor babies that had flash cards shoved in their tiny faces so that they could learn to say "house" or "flower" first. You know what we found out, we found out once they started school eventually they all even out. Yes, sorry to tell you that your wonderful genius may have a full vocabulary at 6 months and walked the day they were born and could name all the State Capitols by 2. I assure you by the time they are leaving elementary school they will not be teaching the class, rather sitting right next to the baby that didn't speak and walk until 10 months or, heaven forbid, the baby that couldn't talk until their first birthday. Yes there will always be people that are more advanced but what we tend to forget is everyone is advanced in some way or the other and those are the skills that will make or break us when we/they grow. As parents isn't our real job to praise their abilities, but also teach them the other lessons as well. Isn't our job to explain although you may rule this field you need to practice because there is always someone that you haven't yet met that is a good as, or better than you. Isn't also OUR job to make sure that they don't take their talent for granted or more important keep who they are in check and ensure their head not getting too swollen? This doesn't only apply to athletics isn't as important to teaching the bright young math student the same lessons? That yes you are very smart however, so will everyone in your college math class, should you choose to go to prestigious one. The advanced go to advanced colleges making them just like everyone else. Now that they are among their peers are they no longer smart? Of course they are. Maybe just not the smartest. Is the athlete any less talented? Of course not, maybe just not the best. And if they remain the best how far out in front do these advanced students stand out?
I am sorry for this soapbox moment but I needed to get that out. I can only speak for myself but raising children through 2 generations helped me understand that none of the items we buy and no matter how many flash cards pushed in their faces will not create a responsible adult. Oh yes, as parents we get to say how young Johnny was when he learned to read, and my kid could walk before your kid. But again, I ask what does this matter? Teaching them to say hello to an adult when they see them, explaining the importance of family and appreciating and taking care of their home and valuables because it will not be replaced just because they broke it or wanted a better one. Teaching them to be accountable for their own actions, their own school work, yes all of it, when THEIR test are, what project needs to be done and when it is due. And God forgive me here but how about instead of a landscaper the children actually get a little dirty and help their parents outside. Not asking to do it instead of, but together would be nice.
I've learned that by teaching them that the world does not revolve around them, and that they aren't always going to be best, you can't do everything well but you should always do your best in everything you do. But most of all I have learned that holding back and giving them a real gift...the gift of being different is probably the best gift of all. Why? What?
Not saying yes because everyone else could go is a gift. I learned from doing that with my son that the real lesson he learned was not to be a follower. This really came in handy when the real issues started and he was very comfortable in not participating but still being in the environment. Life lessons continue to come to us no matter what our age and no matter what we think we already know. I know I have a lot to learn, I know that each child is different and must be raised accordingly and I know if a child is taught to be confident they will also know different is not only okay, but good.
My lesson learned is not to drop the ball when these hard times pass, teach my girls to be ladies, teach them to wear what fits well and is actually age appropriate and to appreciate the few frivolous items that we all should have. Not to care if the other girls think your dress is appropriate, but to worry if you bought it because you liked it and not because everyone else was getting a new one. Remember to remind the youngest to look at people when you are speaking to them, stop what you are doing and address your friends parents, my friends and any adult/child that you know. I don't care who you are with, stop and acknowledge them. Say thank you when a kindness is shown and do not allow the opinions of others to determine who is socially acceptable. I want for her to understand that a "home friend" or a "family friend" are the ones that will be there later. Trust me on this, I have been blessed with some awesome, loyal friends in my life. The children being snubbed have parents too and it is heartbreaking when your child is left out. So why do we only see it when it is our child being left out? Why do we wear blinders when they are doing the snubbing? Is it fear that our children won't be cool? Whatever the reason our children are the ones that will pay the price later for lessons not learned. When they head into the real world and are just a regular Joe and the people in college and the work place don't care who they are will inevitably play on their heads. When they head out into the real world and find out that money doesn't just appear and you have to own regular boots over the expensive stylish ones in order to afford gas and insurance, maybe just maybe not have been given everything growing up wasn't such a bad thing. Because they learned at a young age the meaning of responsible choices. Money in the bank is a wonderful thing and I am very grateful that I thought enough of my son to teach him these very lessons and one I want to continue with my girls (mainly the youngest because after time I must admit I lost some of that). You see, he just graduated college without any loans over his head or mine. I knew college was coming and planned ahead and actually used that money for college and he received the extras when they were warranted. He was given a car, just not a brand new one and he was allotted insurance money until he could cover it himself. That was in college.
Lessons learned: 1. What I really needed to change in my parenting is basically to change back.
2. Remind my girls that acceptance is wonderful but self respect/confidence is better.
3. Respect for yourself and others. Really and truly, like actually do it.
4. Teach them to focus on what is important to them and go for it.
5. Be the parent and not worry about the popular choice; focus on the right choice. Really does make the difference.
Big picture never be over confident or arrogant be happy for your blessings, appreciate family and friends and never go down to someone else's level, bring them up to yours. And if you can't bring them up to yours, move on.
Turns, steps down from soapbox and walks away.
I was just telling him that I am actually kind of grateful that we aren't doing as well as we were because it reminds us that it isn't always going to be there and to appreciate the small things that are now so unappreciated. Stupid things like singing in a car, watching a television show all together in one room. You know, like we did in the old days when everyone didn't have their own televisions in their bedrooms. Actually, we did when I was growing up, but my parents used to have family nights and when would all watch together. We would put on an OTB channel or something like that with horse racing and my father would make his famous "7-up floats" and we would bet on the races. Not with actual money, or if we did we used coins. It truly was so much fun. After that my father would usually break into an impromptu game of Let's Make a Deal with your winnings. Man, that game drove me crazy. I guess you can say I don't like to lose so the fear of the inevitable zonk drove me insane.
Anyway, I am hoping things turn around, of course, but I hope that when it does, some things will remain the same. I really thought that I didn't indulge my kids, and actually, for today's standards I really don't. Who set these standards and why did we all, or at least why did I jump on board? I'm not in any way saying my children don't deserve nice things or that other children don't deserve nice things. With my son I always tried to go with advice that was given to me when he was young. Basically, what I was told is not to give him so much that he can't succeed on his own later in life. I didn't agree at first, my response was doesn't he deserve the best I can afford him? He was a product of the "flash card babies", and the "signing them up for nursery school before they were born" generation. So the fact that I spent as much as some colleges were getting for nursery school was not unheard of. Well, to me it was, but his Godmother talked me into it. Again, it was the Yuppie parenting days so I felt I couldn't let him start life at a disadvantage. I guess everything goes in cycles, he was raised with the "must have the best education," and "walk first, talk first" super babies generation. I am happy to say I didn't partake in the rest of the BS. Although I did want him to have a great start education wise. I don't know that having a good start necessarily entails what he learned. It may have been a bit much. For example, I don't feel a 2 1/2 year needs to know the chambers of the heart, be able to put a complete human skeleton together and name all the bones, speak Spanish and all the other things they taught him to do. They did teach him to read and read well, so for that I am grateful. Maybe it's me but taking your child out of their car seat and away from playing so they can learn these things is a bit much to say the least. For those of you that are raising your children now are most likely gasping at what I spent and what he was learning and that parents were signing children yet to be born up for private schools but we are the same parents buying $100 boots for young girls. And forget about the bags they are carrying!! I know we are all now saying, "oh it's not a real bag." Well, then why have it, why not just say, "Sorry we can't afford it." or "You are not a Hilton, thank God!" Do the girls today really need the items we are buying them any more than those poor babies that had flash cards shoved in their tiny faces so that they could learn to say "house" or "flower" first. You know what we found out, we found out once they started school eventually they all even out. Yes, sorry to tell you that your wonderful genius may have a full vocabulary at 6 months and walked the day they were born and could name all the State Capitols by 2. I assure you by the time they are leaving elementary school they will not be teaching the class, rather sitting right next to the baby that didn't speak and walk until 10 months or, heaven forbid, the baby that couldn't talk until their first birthday. Yes there will always be people that are more advanced but what we tend to forget is everyone is advanced in some way or the other and those are the skills that will make or break us when we/they grow. As parents isn't our real job to praise their abilities, but also teach them the other lessons as well. Isn't our job to explain although you may rule this field you need to practice because there is always someone that you haven't yet met that is a good as, or better than you. Isn't also OUR job to make sure that they don't take their talent for granted or more important keep who they are in check and ensure their head not getting too swollen? This doesn't only apply to athletics isn't as important to teaching the bright young math student the same lessons? That yes you are very smart however, so will everyone in your college math class, should you choose to go to prestigious one. The advanced go to advanced colleges making them just like everyone else. Now that they are among their peers are they no longer smart? Of course they are. Maybe just not the smartest. Is the athlete any less talented? Of course not, maybe just not the best. And if they remain the best how far out in front do these advanced students stand out?
I am sorry for this soapbox moment but I needed to get that out. I can only speak for myself but raising children through 2 generations helped me understand that none of the items we buy and no matter how many flash cards pushed in their faces will not create a responsible adult. Oh yes, as parents we get to say how young Johnny was when he learned to read, and my kid could walk before your kid. But again, I ask what does this matter? Teaching them to say hello to an adult when they see them, explaining the importance of family and appreciating and taking care of their home and valuables because it will not be replaced just because they broke it or wanted a better one. Teaching them to be accountable for their own actions, their own school work, yes all of it, when THEIR test are, what project needs to be done and when it is due. And God forgive me here but how about instead of a landscaper the children actually get a little dirty and help their parents outside. Not asking to do it instead of, but together would be nice.
I've learned that by teaching them that the world does not revolve around them, and that they aren't always going to be best, you can't do everything well but you should always do your best in everything you do. But most of all I have learned that holding back and giving them a real gift...the gift of being different is probably the best gift of all. Why? What?
Not saying yes because everyone else could go is a gift. I learned from doing that with my son that the real lesson he learned was not to be a follower. This really came in handy when the real issues started and he was very comfortable in not participating but still being in the environment. Life lessons continue to come to us no matter what our age and no matter what we think we already know. I know I have a lot to learn, I know that each child is different and must be raised accordingly and I know if a child is taught to be confident they will also know different is not only okay, but good.
My lesson learned is not to drop the ball when these hard times pass, teach my girls to be ladies, teach them to wear what fits well and is actually age appropriate and to appreciate the few frivolous items that we all should have. Not to care if the other girls think your dress is appropriate, but to worry if you bought it because you liked it and not because everyone else was getting a new one. Remember to remind the youngest to look at people when you are speaking to them, stop what you are doing and address your friends parents, my friends and any adult/child that you know. I don't care who you are with, stop and acknowledge them. Say thank you when a kindness is shown and do not allow the opinions of others to determine who is socially acceptable. I want for her to understand that a "home friend" or a "family friend" are the ones that will be there later. Trust me on this, I have been blessed with some awesome, loyal friends in my life. The children being snubbed have parents too and it is heartbreaking when your child is left out. So why do we only see it when it is our child being left out? Why do we wear blinders when they are doing the snubbing? Is it fear that our children won't be cool? Whatever the reason our children are the ones that will pay the price later for lessons not learned. When they head into the real world and are just a regular Joe and the people in college and the work place don't care who they are will inevitably play on their heads. When they head out into the real world and find out that money doesn't just appear and you have to own regular boots over the expensive stylish ones in order to afford gas and insurance, maybe just maybe not have been given everything growing up wasn't such a bad thing. Because they learned at a young age the meaning of responsible choices. Money in the bank is a wonderful thing and I am very grateful that I thought enough of my son to teach him these very lessons and one I want to continue with my girls (mainly the youngest because after time I must admit I lost some of that). You see, he just graduated college without any loans over his head or mine. I knew college was coming and planned ahead and actually used that money for college and he received the extras when they were warranted. He was given a car, just not a brand new one and he was allotted insurance money until he could cover it himself. That was in college.
Lessons learned: 1. What I really needed to change in my parenting is basically to change back.
2. Remind my girls that acceptance is wonderful but self respect/confidence is better.
3. Respect for yourself and others. Really and truly, like actually do it.
4. Teach them to focus on what is important to them and go for it.
5. Be the parent and not worry about the popular choice; focus on the right choice. Really does make the difference.
Big picture never be over confident or arrogant be happy for your blessings, appreciate family and friends and never go down to someone else's level, bring them up to yours. And if you can't bring them up to yours, move on.
Turns, steps down from soapbox and walks away.
Monday, February 22, 2010
3 followers....yippie
I wanted to come up with something profound to welcome my 3rd follower and good friend, Denise. I did come up with something to post but like my other posts it wasn't very profound and this time just couldn't get myself to hit the post button. Maybe it isn't late enough in the evening when my evil twin rears her ugly head and post silly nonsensical items on my blog.
What I do need to do however, is acknowledge my 3rd follower and thank her for joining me on yet another one of my crazy ventures. Just a little sidebar for those who are not familiar with this friend, she not only looked at my ten thousand pictures I have taken she also allowed me to photograph her in many. This is not something she is comfortable with but does it because it is important to me. I am now like one of her children, she must see all that I do and say very good. She has also told me when things were not so good, she listens to me endlessly ramble on about nonsense and has been a great friend to my daughters as well. So Denise, welcome aboard and although I will try to make you proud, this blog might just be one of those mother's love type things in the sense that it is only good because you care about me. My real thank you to all my followers, (all 3 of you) was not to post on the last few days so that their eyeballs could get a rest and their brains wouldn't have to hurt so much. Enjoy the break because something tells me I'll be back and if my evil twin has her way it will be sooner rather than later.
Thinking of a very special friend today and sending his family lots of love. We all miss you, Mr. D. I will always miss our sing a longs as you were one of the few that actually allowed me to sing. :)
What I do need to do however, is acknowledge my 3rd follower and thank her for joining me on yet another one of my crazy ventures. Just a little sidebar for those who are not familiar with this friend, she not only looked at my ten thousand pictures I have taken she also allowed me to photograph her in many. This is not something she is comfortable with but does it because it is important to me. I am now like one of her children, she must see all that I do and say very good. She has also told me when things were not so good, she listens to me endlessly ramble on about nonsense and has been a great friend to my daughters as well. So Denise, welcome aboard and although I will try to make you proud, this blog might just be one of those mother's love type things in the sense that it is only good because you care about me. My real thank you to all my followers, (all 3 of you) was not to post on the last few days so that their eyeballs could get a rest and their brains wouldn't have to hurt so much. Enjoy the break because something tells me I'll be back and if my evil twin has her way it will be sooner rather than later.
Thinking of a very special friend today and sending his family lots of love. We all miss you, Mr. D. I will always miss our sing a longs as you were one of the few that actually allowed me to sing. :)
Thursday, February 18, 2010
How does it feeeeel?
I got it! Maybe if I didn't make very clear to them how badly I wanted this column. Maybe I was playing it too cool when I spoke to them. When Bill and I went for our nightly midnight coffee run last night....you know what; I am just going to show you. I am going to give you, my two followers a piece of what my poor husband (and children) go through on a daily basis living with me.
Picture it, it is about 1am we are driving to my husband's ole faithful and true love (7-11) to buy his nightly cup of coffee. I cannot get this column off my mind so I start singing and changing the words to every song to fit my column needs. It went something like this.
Ode to live on column mountain followed up with to the tune of Joker by Steve Miller:
some people call me spacey Dawnie
some call the columnist of loooove
some just think I'm crazaaay
cause of this column I speak ooooofff
people are going to starting talking about me baby
so you better make your move
yeah make your move
ya better stop procrastinating and call me
cause I'm right here, right here, right here at home
I'm a writer
a photographer
and I'm a mommyyyyy
really want a column
so please give it to me
I'm a writer
I'm a photographer
I'm a midnight coffee runner
needing a column oh so desperatelyyyyyy
It's the coolest thing you ever will reeead
really loves those trees but
But let's cut one more down
to make sure there's a page for meeeeee
Obviously, you are getting the point but that made me realize, maybe I need to beg a little so from there I broke out into a little Bob Dylan where I ask all you already in possession of one, "how does it feel"? So if you don't mind as I make my "lifeliner" bid for a column here goes:
Once upon a time I began to whine
I really want a column and that ain't no lie
I really do
I called, you said, "maybe"
OK Dawn, enough, they get the point. I've already taken up too much of your time so I will just cut to the chase rather than make you read another entire song. Bear in mind though, Bill not only sat through these 2 but many, many others and for those of you that have had the pleasure of hearing me sing, know that it actually is anything but a pleasure. And the fact that he sits there listens with a smile as if I can carry a tune and then joins in is why I love this man. Without further a do here is the conclusion to partial plea:
I want to know how it feels, I want to know how it feels,
to have a column of my own, of my very own
so please give it to meee
How about the Rolling Stone????
So dear newspaper people, please I ask, please let me know how it feelsss.
I know you probably think I've lost my mind but for those of you that might be reading and already know me, know that it is long gone. In fact it is so far gone that this behavior is actually quite normal for me. I will give you all a little rest over the next few days and sit back and quietly wait for the call to come in informing me the column is mine or perhaps to even give in and find a plan B. I wish you a great day/evening and I look forward to your comments, post and dreams.
Picture it, it is about 1am we are driving to my husband's ole faithful and true love (7-11) to buy his nightly cup of coffee. I cannot get this column off my mind so I start singing and changing the words to every song to fit my column needs. It went something like this.
Ode to live on column mountain followed up with to the tune of Joker by Steve Miller:
some people call me spacey Dawnie
some call the columnist of loooove
some just think I'm crazaaay
cause of this column I speak ooooofff
people are going to starting talking about me baby
so you better make your move
yeah make your move
ya better stop procrastinating and call me
cause I'm right here, right here, right here at home
I'm a writer
a photographer
and I'm a mommyyyyy
really want a column
so please give it to me
I'm a writer
I'm a photographer
I'm a midnight coffee runner
needing a column oh so desperatelyyyyyy
It's the coolest thing you ever will reeead
really loves those trees but
But let's cut one more down
to make sure there's a page for meeeeee
Obviously, you are getting the point but that made me realize, maybe I need to beg a little so from there I broke out into a little Bob Dylan where I ask all you already in possession of one, "how does it feel"? So if you don't mind as I make my "lifeliner" bid for a column here goes:
Once upon a time I began to whine
I really want a column and that ain't no lie
I really do
I called, you said, "maybe"
OK Dawn, enough, they get the point. I've already taken up too much of your time so I will just cut to the chase rather than make you read another entire song. Bear in mind though, Bill not only sat through these 2 but many, many others and for those of you that have had the pleasure of hearing me sing, know that it actually is anything but a pleasure. And the fact that he sits there listens with a smile as if I can carry a tune and then joins in is why I love this man. Without further a do here is the conclusion to partial plea:
I want to know how it feels, I want to know how it feels,
to have a column of my own, of my very own
so please give it to meee
How about the Rolling Stone????
So dear newspaper people, please I ask, please let me know how it feelsss.
I know you probably think I've lost my mind but for those of you that might be reading and already know me, know that it is long gone. In fact it is so far gone that this behavior is actually quite normal for me. I will give you all a little rest over the next few days and sit back and quietly wait for the call to come in informing me the column is mine or perhaps to even give in and find a plan B. I wish you a great day/evening and I look forward to your comments, post and dreams.
Just sitting patiently, waiting for the world to realize it's my oyster
I am so excited, I now have 2 followers (plus me) that's 3. To you it may not be a lot but to me it's getting crowded in here. Hey, haven't you heard the expression two is company, three is a crowd? Well, thanks to Nick we are now a crowd, a crowd people an honest to God crowd. I know it's a bit premature for crowd control to be called in should we all decide to come out of cyberspace and meet for let say drinks or something but we are on our way.
So as I sit here waiting for my lipstick to kick in thought it might a good idea to use the time to figure out plan B. Not saying in anyway I'm giving up on plan A but I do have to think about the what if; or should I say, reality? What if it never happens, I'm trying to head Kenny Rogers warning and know when to count em and the even more important lesson of knowing when to run........there'll be time enough to count em when the deal is done. I know it is time to run; I know the deal is done but then last night while watching the Olympics a skater gave me a signal. A signal you ask, yes a signal and yes it as for me; the ice skater skated to the song the impossible dream. I'm now thinking oh, " Kenny the deal might not be done just yet". OK, it is but I'm not done yet and what the heck does Kenny Rogers know anyway, have you seen this guys face lately? Hey Kenny, you might want to find another surgeon with all that money you won because obviously your cosmetic surgery deal isn't done either yet.
I know my dream like the song is the impossible dream, really I do know that but I am not ready to accept that. Maybe they just didn't get the memo that I'm now wearing the more expensive and yet very tasteful shade of lipstick. And let us not forget it is sporting the really great brush applicator. Or maybe the world just doesn't know it is my oyster yet. I don't know how long it takes to get the word out.
Non-the-less, time to think of a plan B just in case they did get the memo and the world does in fact know it's my oyster but somehow just doesn't care. So what else, what else do I want to do? Model? Movie Star? Hell, I've been racking up quite a few hours on Farmville, maybe I should buy a farm. This might be yet another great opportunity for y'all to jump on in. Ideas, followers? Sideliners this where you are usually good, we are great at coming up with wonderful ideas and opportunities for everyone else. Anyone?? I'm pretty sure there isn't anyone actually out there so I'm not taking the silence personal or anything, just wishing I had even an idea of a Plan B. When am I finally going to understand the power of lipstick and how to utilize it? I haven't even reapplied it all day. How am I ever going to get any further in life if I don't finally get the concept down?
While I go and get the lipstick for another application as well as an oyster opener (for when the lipstick kicks in and offers start flying in). If anyone wants to chime in here with a plan B or even better something they would like just to share, feel free. As they said on SNL, " talk amongst yourselves".
So as I sit here waiting for my lipstick to kick in thought it might a good idea to use the time to figure out plan B. Not saying in anyway I'm giving up on plan A but I do have to think about the what if; or should I say, reality? What if it never happens, I'm trying to head Kenny Rogers warning and know when to count em and the even more important lesson of knowing when to run........there'll be time enough to count em when the deal is done. I know it is time to run; I know the deal is done but then last night while watching the Olympics a skater gave me a signal. A signal you ask, yes a signal and yes it as for me; the ice skater skated to the song the impossible dream. I'm now thinking oh, " Kenny the deal might not be done just yet". OK, it is but I'm not done yet and what the heck does Kenny Rogers know anyway, have you seen this guys face lately? Hey Kenny, you might want to find another surgeon with all that money you won because obviously your cosmetic surgery deal isn't done either yet.I know my dream like the song is the impossible dream, really I do know that but I am not ready to accept that. Maybe they just didn't get the memo that I'm now wearing the more expensive and yet very tasteful shade of lipstick. And let us not forget it is sporting the really great brush applicator. Or maybe the world just doesn't know it is my oyster yet. I don't know how long it takes to get the word out.
Non-the-less, time to think of a plan B just in case they did get the memo and the world does in fact know it's my oyster but somehow just doesn't care. So what else, what else do I want to do? Model? Movie Star? Hell, I've been racking up quite a few hours on Farmville, maybe I should buy a farm. This might be yet another great opportunity for y'all to jump on in. Ideas, followers? Sideliners this where you are usually good, we are great at coming up with wonderful ideas and opportunities for everyone else. Anyone?? I'm pretty sure there isn't anyone actually out there so I'm not taking the silence personal or anything, just wishing I had even an idea of a Plan B. When am I finally going to understand the power of lipstick and how to utilize it? I haven't even reapplied it all day. How am I ever going to get any further in life if I don't finally get the concept down?
While I go and get the lipstick for another application as well as an oyster opener (for when the lipstick kicks in and offers start flying in). If anyone wants to chime in here with a plan B or even better something they would like just to share, feel free. As they said on SNL, " talk amongst yourselves".
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Put a little lipstick on (only if you shove it when I'm done)
Wow, I have a follower, my first official follower. I am so excited those column haters will be sorry now. I should call them and let them know you might want to jump on the Dawnie bandwagon. Hey fellas she is now not only licious but she has a follower. The fact that she is my friend doesn't matter and the fact that she is always very supportive doesn't count either. She is always honest with me and she liked my post, haha. They'll be sorry now or at least they are going to be sorry if they don't call me soon with that yes, yes, we had no idea how big you are, we must have your column. OK, I guess you have surmised by now that the big maybe didn't turn into the big yes. Its OK though for some reason I'm not totally crushed, I am disappointed but not crushed, weird but I'm actually proud of myself for not only trying, but they actually really did like it as did many others. I must say though no matter who did or who didn't I tried, didn't just talk about it actually tried. The only thing really plaguing me is whether or not I was wearing my lipstick that day.
I'm sure you my tens of hundreds of readers; OK one reader (2 if you count me) might be wondering what the title of this blog has to do with the above rant? Well, nothing really I mean I really don't think lipstick has anything to do with it but apparently lipstick has power....really if you put a little lipstick on things will happen, doors will open, children will heal and I would have received a column. I was unaware of the lipstick power for many, many years but when my kids were younger and I was going through a real hard time of adjusting to being a stay at home mom, I was told, "just put a little lipstick on". OK, WHAT?!?! No, seriously, WHAT?!? Anyway, this is what I was told. To make matters worse when someone very close to me had someone she loved very much in surgery a woman of this certain age advised her as well to apply a little lipstick. In defense of this woman I must add that she did advise my friend to apply a little rouge too but I think that was only necessary because there was a surgery going on.
I'm sure you my tens of hundreds of readers; OK one reader (2 if you count me) might be wondering what the title of this blog has to do with the above rant? Well, nothing really I mean I really don't think lipstick has anything to do with it but apparently lipstick has power....really if you put a little lipstick on things will happen, doors will open, children will heal and I would have received a column. I was unaware of the lipstick power for many, many years but when my kids were younger and I was going through a real hard time of adjusting to being a stay at home mom, I was told, "just put a little lipstick on". OK, WHAT?!?! No, seriously, WHAT?!? Anyway, this is what I was told. To make matters worse when someone very close to me had someone she loved very much in surgery a woman of this certain age advised her as well to apply a little lipstick. In defense of this woman I must add that she did advise my friend to apply a little rouge too but I think that was only necessary because there was a surgery going on.
Back to my dilemma, I can't get off my mind whether or not I was I wearing lipstick that day? You know the big day (the day I handed in the column) If I did have it on, was it the wrong color? Wrong brand? Not expensive enough and if not how dare I expect someone to take me seriously enough to actually give me a column? How could I be so damn careless and just leave the house all willy nilly and lipstick free; column in hand and have the nerve to actually hand it in. By the time I entered the building I should have been reapplying. What was I thinking? As you can clearly see, I've learned my lesson and I've been thinking a lot about this and went out and bought a very nice middle of the road shade lipstick. Seriously I went all out, none of this cheap stuff, I bought the good stuff. I even went as far as to buy the kind with the brush applicator rather than the ones with the cheap sponge. I was going to buy the typical lipstick that you just roll up and apply but I thought the brush applicator might really give me the edge. I thought to myself, hell no if you are going to go for things in life you must not cheap out on the applicator. Dammit Dawn, for once in your life give it your all buy the damn brush applicator.
I have to say though I feel really bad for men though, how the hell are they supposed to move forward in life without the benefit of the lipstick power. This blog was supposed to be a place for everyone. A place for any "sideliner" or "lifeliner" that wanted to improve something about themselves or share could open up and hopefully someone reading might be able to assist them.
I guess I put the question out to the lifeliners that are also those women of a certain age, what about the men? Are they just screwed? People these days have come pretty far in accepting almost anything but I don't know that they are ready for the lipstick wearing man. I don't know for sure, maybe we are but I'm sure there will still be those men like my husband for one that just won't be comfortable. So does this mean between my poor choice in lipstick and his lack of ability to wear it mean we might as well pack it in? Nah, I don't think so. Maybe they could wear chapstick? I guess that could open a whole set of their own problems too, do they need to buy the actual brand chapstick or can it be an alternative? Possibly Vaseline or that Barts bees or whatever the heck it is.
So my fellow bloggers and my follower I leave you with this, go out and buy yourself some lipstick. Make your dream be known, apply the lipstick and conquer the world. I have my lipstick with the brush applicator (going to make Bill wear chapstick) the world is my oyster!!!
****A little side note of thanks to everyone that has given me such wonderful feedback on this silly blog and especially Amy, my first official follower. Thanks everyone and seriously, feel free to post whatever your dream is, maybe someone is reading that can help. A very Happy Valentine's Day to you all*******
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
In awe
This is just a quick note. I was looking through my friends on facebook tonight and was thinking how in awe I am of so many of my friends. I have three friends that fought breast cancer and won, another that is now battling it and I am confident that he too will be victorious, another that watched her child go a through a kidney transplant and the child that actually had the transplant, his sister and father. Another that has been a single mother for many years and has managed to succeed in her career, bought her own home on her own and gives so much to everyone around her. I have another that just battled an illness with her husband and thankfully they too won their battle. Another raised three girls successfully. They are grown and are all wonderful loving young ladies. Another that is successful, caring and giving and who also bought a home without the help of a man. Another that faces a personal journey everyday and is so loyal to their family and I must say to me as well. One of my friends has always been so supportive of me and although she has a wonderful career as an attorney has always treated me as an equal in business and her friendship has always been unconditional. I have 3 that have lost spouses and yet are raising their children and living their lives with such grace and strength that I can only wish to emulate. I have several children that have already had to face the loss of a parent and yet have totally kept their act together, have not lost their faith nor their love of life. I have another friend that also has a sick child and has been such a wonderful advocate in getting the word out there on her child's disease all while allowing this child a normal life. There is nothing normal about what this child faces everyday and yet she plays sports, participates in plays, goes out with her friends and then the down side goes to doctors, uses breathing machines every day and night and that is just piece of who this young strong girl is. My nephew the child I spoke of before that needed the transplant has also taught me more life lessons than I can even list. He is amazing and strong, sweet and sensitive and I love him beyond any explanation I can give here. He faces every day knowing that more transplants are on the horizon and the only thing certain in his life and the other young girl I spoke of life is there is nothing certain. They just live their life's and wait for a someone to find a cure. These children continue to teach me something new everyday and I adore and look up to them so much. I could go on and on about all these people but I think you get the point. I don't know why this all hit me tonight as this is nothing to new to me. I know their stories but for some reason as I was looking at their pictures tonight and knowing what they have all been through made me realize how very lucky I am to have all these people in my life. I will have to ask you to excuse whatever spelling errors or words that are missing from this or what parts might not make sense I just wanted to write what I was feeling, while I was feeling it. Don't feel like going back and checking for errors. I guess while searching for growth and happiness in these crazy times these are the people that we can all learn from. We all have stories indeed but take the strength from these true lifeliners and don't get stuck in silly ruts, don't' worry about who said what to whom, if you were over looked when people made plans, I'm not calling them because they haven't called me. This stuff is silly, really it is. Who cares what car people are driving or how much or little they may or may not have? It really doesn't matter, living the best life we can with what we were giving is the ticket. At least that is what I'm thinking. Wow, guess it wasn't such a quick post after all. If anyone is reading my blogs and if you stayed with me all the way through this, thank you because the people I am speaking of are worth the time you put in. xoxo Dawn
Sunday, February 7, 2010
So the journey begins
So I need your thoughts on blogs.
Reason I ask is that I am in the process of possibly getting my own column in a newspaper. My own column, who would believe that? Anyway after many back and forth calls to the editor, all of which were positive, I get a big maybe. Needless to say this has been driving me crazy. So, I mentioned it to a co-worker and she said “Hey, don't give up, why don't you blog?” I'm thinking blog? I wasn't really sure if I wanted a blog or not because I didn't know much about them but was leaning against doing it. However, I want this column so bad that I can taste it. Actually, all of those positive calls not only allowed me to taste, but speak of it, OUT LOUD. I knew I was crazy to say it out loud especially because I am not a say-it-out-loud kind of person. I am more of a “think of it silently, and maybe, just maybe share it with a few close people” type of person. So my co-worker told me to rent the movie “Julie and Julia” starring Meryl Streep. And as she walked out the door she looked back at me and said, "Rent the movie and blog." So I did in fact rent the movie and didn't really get the connection to me. Well, yes she blogged, but I didn’t understand the big picture. So here are my thoughts; if this person from Queens can get a movie just from blogging about cooking someone else’s recipes, why can’t I get a small column? I am in no way putting this Julie down, it’s the opposite. I admire her because she is just like the rest of us only she is a true lifeliner.
I am not going to use this blog as a forum for my column, but as more of an outlet for all of us that are ready to be happy, ready to do something for ourselves but not ready to take away from giving to our families or whatever. This will be an interactive blog where the “lifeliners,” as I have now nicknamed them will give hope to us “sideliners.” Now by lifeliner, I mean people who have struggled or have seen hard times in one way or another, but have had a happy ending. Of course these people are not problem free, they are just people like us sideliners who have managed to take life by the balls and say “No, I'm going to win!” Having said that, when I refer to us sideliners, I in no way mean we are lazy or unmotivated people. We are just people more comfortable care taking for others, or sitting on the bleachers cheering for our loved ones. You know who you are‑-you define YOUR success by the success of those around you. You may sometimes feel guilty for whatever joy comes your way, and you cannot seem to just say thank you when a compliment is given, or maybe you are a sideliner who has been struck with depression from hard times, life changes, sick children, death of a loved one or whatever(???). This is your turn to be happy and to achieve. It is okay to want for yourself and to be happy and to achieve. Like the woman in the movie, I have no idea if anyone out there is reading this but as she suggested, I'm blogging. Has it really come to this, are we really a generation of people so far removed from one another that we write to cyberspace not knowing if anyone is out there? Well if so, consider this my ticket to board. I hope at the end of this I will have my column but in turn the lifeliners will have started blogs on what they know to help other sideliners like myself find their way. I was speaking to a friend of mine today and I'm hoping that she writes on here with a piece of her story along with a link to her blog where she can help who share her story as she could really benefit from telling her story as well as help many people. I'm hoping that someone struggling to lose weight will write in and let us know of their struggle so we can all motivate each other. From there, they may blog about their journey, the mother that found a new career after her children although still young are more independent, someone that has a talent and not sure where to bring it, you can say on here I can sing, I can draw well and someone will hopefully answer you and say there is this club that meets on such and such a day, join us, or if you are that hard working successful person that is always there to be a friend to all those around you, this is your time to make your dream come true and not just because it pays the bills and you are good at it but because you desire it. Whether it be for a mate, a hobby or a writer yourself, it is your turn. Whatever your story I hope that my blog will give you the courage to see the light at the end of the tunnel and the courage to move forward. In “Julie and Julia” the girl from Queens got her life story written into a movie, and maybe this writer might actually get a column. And you, the reader might actually get your wish. If you are out there and if you desire something, don't hold it in. Let us know and together let’s see what happens. No matter what, in the meantime, we have each other. Look, we all know the country is a mess, we are all broke and scared of tomorrow. We need to dream, we need to have some positive reality. Again, I don't know if anyone is reading this or not, but I surely hope you are and that you respond. Sideliners--state your dreams and lifeliners help us know how to get there and once you arrive how it feels. Here's hoping my ticket to ride isn't a ride to no man's land.
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